HoMe SwEEt HoMe...

29th June 2006

Back in KL. Is good to see my family after so long.On my way home, I was still puzzled by my own emotion and feelings. What exactly that I am not happy about? It all started since Monday.
After class, I went to meet Ping in town. Perhaps both of us are tired, and shouldn't have come out. So, it wasn't really a good hang out time. Reason that we wanted to meet up is because we won't be seeing each other for the next 7 days.
Then Tuesday, during lunch break, I called Ping and he was on his way to work. I could felt he wasnt in the mood of talking partly because he is in a bus with faulty air-con...Well, so we hang up quickly. That day after class, I suppose to go for my facial appointment. I went and because I wasnt feeling very happy, I went to Kinokuniya and got a few books for myself. Hopefuly it would cheer me up. I also called Sherly out as I don't feel like going home though I am actually quite tired.
So, I have dinner with Sherly and after which I join she and her friend in pub near city hall called "waiting bar". We were there till midnight, nothing much, chit-chat,catching up with the lost time. Then I felt better...or I think I felt better...Sherly share with me about her r/s and I knew I couldn't be worse. Yet it's not to be compare, after all we are dating different guys and we have different needs.
I got message from Derrick, happily telling me he won't be away. He've decided to find a job in S'pore. So, he could celebrate my birthday with me. Then it occur to me that Ping won't be around for my birthday. It's not really a big day for me as I never celebrated birthday. But today, I wish the one who say that to me is Ping...I knew Derrick have something for me, though many time I told him I can't return his kindness. But he just don't care. And he just beg me to allow him to treat me nicely. I can't say I am not touched by these...After all, I am thankful that I met these nice people...Just that there's nothing much I could do. I told myself, if this guy is so kind to you, be kind to him too.
Anyway, by the time I am home, it's almost 2am. I showered and packed coz I am going home the next day morning.And to my surprise, Ping message me. I could have call him but I didn't instead I told him that I am going to sleep. The truth is I never sleep till around 4am. Maybe I just don't feel like talking right now. Jess ask if I decided to cof. But I told her, I need to consider. Maybe it's not a good idea of spending too much time togather. Maybe is time to let each other have a breathing space...